Todays ramblings

Well there is always a crazy amount to do.
September sales are down, store rent and house mortgage is due in October, & there’s credit cards to pay off.
The house still needs nearly as much work as it did a year ago. Winter is fast approaching, is supposed to be worse, & we barely made it through last year.
I need LOTS of insulation & plastic sheeting before winter!
My van is making scary noises & there’s no money to fix/replace it. I can’t even afford an oil change.
My phone (which is a major tool for my business) is all sorts of messed up and must be replaced by the 21st according to my cell provider.  That is more I dont have, not mention my plan price will go up because they were “bought by AT&T so the old towers are being shut down-causing the cell problems.”
I needed to LOWER my bill not be required to RAISE it. 😦

So I am looking at my options. I need to sit down and come up with new totals of all owed. And somehow how cut our costs even more.

I already do not use heat/air/lights when the kids aren’t home. I walk around in the dark freezing. I am going to take all my sewing equipment to the mall to use their utilities instead of ours here too soon. (Right now Im just not sewing so I dont use up utilities.)

We already do not have any “extras” at all– no cable, internet, etc. Although I do have internet on my phone to access my business page from home so I can reply to customers(& post these blog posts). THAT will most likely have to be completely DROPPED. $10 is $10. & I plan to go with my cheapest possible options.

And I am looking into renting out rooms again(my seeing & fabric rooms). It hasnt worked out before because people want a house that is totally remodeled AND has stuff like wifi & laundry if they have to pay rent-even if as little as $200/mth. Any less & I cant even cover their added utilities! (not that $200 will in the winter!) And what would I do if they move in & refuse to pay?? It could end up costing me MORE money.

So. Its going to take a lot of sit down & mapping.

Big Day For Midnight

So our youngest kitten, Midnight, is just over 5mths & heading to get fixed this morning. Poor little guy has no clue.

(Midnight was a gift left by LM just before her passing-LM was our rescue from last year. The scar tissue left from whatever injuries she had when we found her finally was just too much. She never was even able to meow.)

The plan was to get Midnight fixed & then Michael was supposed to take him. BUT now that Michael joined the army, well, I guess Midnight is staying here… at least for now. And being a BOY cat means getting him fixed ASAP before he starts spraying.

I had tried not getting attached as I didn’t plan on keeping him. But when it was time for them to take him, it was HARD. The poor baby had no idea what was about to happen. Hopefully he will just be happy to see me tomorrow & not be too angry. 😉  On the positive side, the guy only charged me $20. Im not sure why or if I pay the rest tomorrow or what. But hey, I wasn’t about to argue.

EVERY black cat there was named Midnight. I guess I could have been a little more creative with his name lol.

Your Name Here(underwear)

So I’ve heard over the years stories of “putting your name in your underwear.” Usually in jokes etc.

But today, doing laundry for 3 boys that are about the same size, I understand this on a whole new level!!

I’m sitting here sorting all sorts of types of clothing & have no clue who 1/2 of it belongs to!  Up til now, simply assigning each boy a certain color hanger & matching laundry basket was enough. And awhile ago I pitched ALL the socks & bought dozens of the SAME type/style of sock to ease the mismatch sock problem. But now they are in overlapping sizes & even I don’t know who’s stuff is whos!

They each have their own style so certain ‘outer item’ things are easy. But I now fully understand the REAL reason for ‘labeling your underwear’… & everything else– not because it could get lost, but because who wants to wear their brothers’ boxers??!! 😉

So that’s it!! Where’s a marker??!!

Hello! (still kicking)

Well my world is a lonely place-constantly giving with no way to refill myself. I hold out hope that will change some day- that is what keeps me going.

Updates:
My oldest son (19) has decided to enlist in the army. He apparently got very high on his military test  & has his pick of any active duty path he wants. Most likely whatever he choses be be highly classified & I wont have any idea where he is etc. Its scary.

I was offered a commercial shoot, advertising space in 1-2 movies, etc.   I was also offered an advertising spot for a county blog & facebook page.

The latter would cost $10 MORE, but both are reasonable.  The problem is I need A LOT of money to even be prepared to do either. I have no professional signage anywhere! At my front gate, around the mall, outside of the mall, or in my store such as section signs. I can’t afford a printer/ink so all the signs I do have I hand wrote.  I HAD banners outside the mall but someone stole them, clips & all.

I still need to come up with the $$$ for painting,  decor, & shelving. & A lot of other more seriously needed  things.

THIS is the turning point. That fine line between success & utter failure. If I had the above things, itd make a giant difference! But how??!! I tried applying for a loan but can’t prove enough income yet. So, to make it til now, I used credit cards. Now I owe arount $2,000.

BUT my 80+ clothing racks are paid off. I’ve put $$$ into buying stock for the store.

And that’s just the store.

I of course still have this house to remodel. I have some pretty serious issues here too, each carrying a hefty price tag. And Im scared of winter coming, as I hear this winter will be worse than last winter-which we barely survived. We are not eligible for ANY government funded programs at all due to the type of mortgage I have.

And overall I think the BIGGEST Issue is that Im doing all this ALONE. All the store stuff. All the house stuff. The housework, dr appts, etc. My health is being effected & I’m gaining a lot of weight. And I’m just sooo tired. No quality, educated man wants to take all this on. & I am NOT going to  settle for someone less now, that I will regret later.  I already lived that life for 13yrs! Never again!!

I just keep pushing myself one step at a time. I have no idea how this will all work or where I will get the money.

I dont know if I should go buy some poster board & hand write some signs & stick them out by the street NOW- even though it isnt very professional, or just wait & keep trying like I am now until I can afford fancy ones.

Well…. that is just some of the plates Im spinning right now. I gotta get back to laundry!

Oh & if you stumble across this, come find my new store on facebook!

http://www.facebook.com/BeeURetail

~Clothing Your Whole Hive For LESS!!~