Today’s Ramblings…

wow, it’s the end of June already??? Time is moving faster than I can keep up lately. & we are supposed to be full moved out of the old place by today…
… I still have about 1/3 to move, plus my son’s car that won’t start & my younger boys’ giant beds that must go out through a 2nd floor window….. & no help. Big surprise huh?

I may be able to borrow  a trailer today for the beds…they wont fit in my van.

Despite 2 months, Michael has done nothing to get his car together for the move. Instead,  he left it sitting in the back so long that all 4 tires are flat and it won’t start at all. He left my air compressor outside and it got stolen a while back. He left my large gas can full of gas outside and of course got stolen too. He hasn’t lifted a finger to look for even odd jobs, & throws tantrums when I ask him to help me pack & move stuff. I’ve found him jobs in the past, but he’s been fired from every one of them & now won’t bother to even call the leads I’ve found for him anymore.  So, he has no job, but expects me to still feed him, cloth him, pay for his car, let him cart off my phone( that he tells everyone is his), leaves a mess everywhere he goes for me to deal with, & THEN has enough nerve to throw a fit because I can’t afford to have home internet, etc, so he can talk to his friends & make plans to go out.

What do you do when your grown children refuse to act grown??? Do you know you have to legally evict your adult child if you want them to move out & they refuse? Yes, court fees, paperwork fees, lawyer fees, & all.

And I know he can’t fully take of himself. But, the fun part is HE still refuses to believe it. & yet, he won’t even TRY.  The kid just seriously with at least two weeks without showering,  because I did not remind him to do it. I wanted to see how long I
he would go before he remembered on his own, but I could not stand the stink anymore.

And he has a list of people he’s flat out lied to about me, who he says will just let him move in with them. & I believe it- his friends drive him all over the place, give him clothes and money, etc, etc. They are all great young guys, with JOBS, their own cars, & well off parents.  But I honestly do not understand why they do all they do for him. & when I come across their parents,  I get dirty looks, etc. Michael has a history of creating large stories to get  what he wants from people. I know this because I’ve been confronted by people who believe his stories, most of his life. A BIG one was when he was still in elementary school. he had completely convinced his Sunday School teachers that he did everything in our home- and I do mean everything- I was pulled aside and completely chewed out by church folk, who basically told me what a horrible mother I was that I would make my young child do all the laundry, all the house cleaning, all the cooking, AND Even make him take care of his younger brothers, While I was supposedly just sitting around doing nothing….
…forget the fact he has issues that cause this- to the point he was admitted in the hospital twice for it!

To this day, it still is very frustrating they would believe such a crazy story from my child over me. And ever since, he’s used it as a “threat” to get out of work or even self care. the minute he’s expected to do any real work, he’s on Twitter or Facebook, etc, bashing me.  I’ve had people threatening to take my kids away from me since I was 14. No matter how perfect I tried become, it’s never been enough.

I’m worn out. I’m tired of doing everything with little help.  & Getting kids to help is more work than them not helping in the first place…

People say they could never do all I do, but when faced with the option of do it, or lose your kids, I’m sure ANYONE could…

I’m no different than anyone else. I don’t have any special powers or extra energy. I’m just a mother fighting to keep my family together, because they are all I have.

So, regardless of how drained I feel, I somehow need to pull myself up & go figure all this out. I don’t understand why God lead me down this path, I’m just wandering down it, waiting for it all to pan out….


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